'Subtle' doesn't even begin to describe the packaging. 'Eyeball-rupturingly garish', however, is right on the money.
A while ago, while working for my previous employer, a man called Alex tried to persuade me not to buy a can of Rockstar and warned me that it tasted deeply vile. Naturally, this very act caused me to hand over my money and promptly pour the entire can down my throat, resulting in my making a face the likes of which hasn’t been seen since the last time Sid James got his rocks off and then vowing never to drink it ever again.
So today, while wandering around Tesco, I noticed that the makers of Rockstar have realised that their product tastes rather similar to carbonated tramp piss – and, to try to mitigate this minor issue, they’ve stuck a bunch of orange juice in there to mask the horror.
Well, the good news is that it works. Rockstar Juiced is probably one of the best-tasting canned energy drinks that I’ve ever had – it’s pretty much exactly the same as drinking half a litre of Fanta with light tropical overtones – apple, mango and passion fruit, to be specific. They’re natural flavours, too, which is helpful.
There’s no disappointment to the caffeine content, either, with the same concentration as Red Bull but in a larger volume can.
Same caffeine content as Red Bull, but twice the volume of a normal-sized Red Bull can.
Ginseng is a good addition – it’s a stimulant on its own, but its activity when combined with caffeine tends to be greater than the sum of its parts. And it’s also nice to see that we have an energy drink which actually contains the energy (in sugar form) that the caffeine/ginseng/taurine will aid in releasing.
It’s doing quite well, up to now. Ingredients are good, taste is good, and the can design means that it essentially doubles as a traffic cone.
It’s a shame, then, that it’s crap.
The first thing that this stuff did was mess my stomach up. Half an hour after drinking this, my body decided that my insides were getting a bit restless and fancied an outing on the porcelain flumes instead.
And as for alertness, a complete lack of it. I’m now an hour down the line and nothing’s happened whatsoever. Which is bizarre, considering the amount of caffeine in this thing, but I’m calling it how I see it, and how I see it is mildly drowsily.
Which is a shame, because it tastes really good.
Hi,
This is a personal fav of mine. By far the best tasting on the market, but I agree with the lack of alertness. I put it down to me getting immune to huge amounts of caffeine.
Keep up the hard work.
Have you tried the green Monster btw? Its quite nice.
I think it’s about time this got to the companies themselves… you might become the tester monkey your trying to be on new, possibly not released stuffs…
Still, i tried this today after a 32 hour run of no sleep (and my body slowly giving up in the last hour or so) and your right that it doesn’t really kick… it has however made my rattiness a little high…
It’s crazy delicious. Makes me hallucinate like a bitch, though. Last time I had some, I was trying to move house. I spent half the time moving boxes really, really fast, and the other time convinced that the Freemasons were in a car outside marking me on how many boxes I was carrying. It was AWESOME.
It’s the one I hadn’t tried as I found the can too terrifying, but I shall give it a whirl…at least if it tastes nice you can have another go to see if the effects can be improved.
If you think Rockstar tastes bad, try find some Monster. It contains some supplement which tastes a bit like chalk.
It’s awesome. Seriously. Stomach the taste and you feel like a god.
@Nicholas – I’ve tried Monster (the blue one, anyway). I’ll be reviewing it soon. My initial thoughts were that it definitely does do the trick, but tastes exactly like deodorant.
RE: Monster
Please, please review Monster (the ‘tropical’ one smells like coconut sick, I hope that encourages you), and also Relentless. I’d love to know how it affects the not-totally-addicted-to-caffeine (ie Not Me).
Thankyouplease.
This is actual a personal favourite in terms of taste…although I still think Red Bull hits you harder/faster…